charamei: Fourth Doctor/Romana II (DW4: Doctor/Romana II)
[personal profile] charamei
This week's theme appears to be smushy ace romance. Not that I'm complaining. I like my smushy ace romance, otherwise I wouldn't write so much of it :D

Title: Let's Do It
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, obviously; just count the tropes.
Characters/Pairings: Four/Romana II
Wordcount: 929
Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who; I'm just playing in the BBC's sandbox for fun and practice.
Author's Note: Calls back to Lost in Translation, thematically speaking. Having read that isn't necessary to make sense of this, though.

Summary: The Doctor and Romana try to make sense of this 'romance' thing.

The Doctor had a book and a determined glint in his eye.

"Birds do it," he wheedled, pouting at her from across the console. "Bees do it. Even educated fleas do it, so why can't we give it a go?"

"Because we're Time Lords," Romana said, "not insects."

"It's an important part of the human experience!"

"Then find a human to try it with."

"I did," he said, and twiddled a knob sulkily. "She said I was doing it all wrong. Come on, where's your intellectual curiosity?"

Romana wasn't convinced that Great Romantic Tropes of Our Time was the best text to use to investigate human mating rituals, but what the hell. It all seemed reasonably harmless.

/\/\/\


Running along the (blue) beach at (green) sunset while holding hands was quite nice, although they probably weren't supposed to be being chased by giant slugs when it happened. Fortunately the slugs were slow and it turned out the sand was lethal to them, so at least she and the Doctor escaped un-slimed.

/\/\/\


The first kiss bore considerable scrutiny. Eventually they agreed on a verdict of 'all right, but slimy', and spent a happy week researching the possibility that human lips released endorphins under pressure, which was much more enjoyable than the kissing.

/\/\/\


Neither of them fancied oysters and chocolate in the same meal, but they were determined, so Romana broke the ingredients down into their component molecules and made them into a nice sensible soup.

The Doctor said it was the best reconstituted food he'd ever tasted, and accidentally set his scarf on fire with the candle.

/\/\/\


Cuddling was very pleasant, but they both knew that already.

/\/\/\


Romana prodded curiously at the large bouquet. "And what do I do with them now that you've given them to me?"

"I don't know." The Doctor shrugged. "Experiment on them?"

She took cuttings, got them to grow under five types of sunlight, discovered three new uses for Terran chlorophyll while she was at it, and wrote a paper.

/\/\/\


They'd done Paris already.

/\/\/\


Getting caught in the rain was harder than it sounded, especially when the TARDIS landed them in an arctic climate. Still, snow was on the list, too, so they dug in, made forts and pelted one another until they got too cold to carry on, which took about two days.

It was messy and damp and childish and fun and glorious, but it didn't make her want to mate with the Doctor as much as it made her want to get a snowball down the back of his scarf.

/\/\/\


The Doctor squinted up at the clouds scudding across the sky. "Look! A cirrus fibratus!"

"There's a cirrus uncinus over there," Romana said, and sighed. "These still aren't rain clouds."

"Maybe not, but at least we can tick cloud-watching off the list."

"Yes. You know, it's funny, but I've not met many humans who knew their meteorology that well..."

/\/\/\


Watching the Doctor sleep was far from thrilling. She caught him napping in the garden and took some notes, then wondered what he was dreaming about – apparently an important part of this ritual.

This was silly, she decided. She could easily find out, and doing so would be much more enjoyable and sociable than just sitting here watching. She laid down next to him, closed her eyes, and they shared a wonderful dream about custard threatening UNIT.

/\/\/\


The Dryneans hadn't had rain in three generations, thanks to a hydrophobic overlord with a primitive meteorological control device. The Doctor was gratified to learn that the overlord and all his minions melted when dampened, and had the machine producing a downpour in minutes.

"Now what?" Romana yelled over the rolling thunder.

He didn't know. So they stood there for a while, then went back to the TARDIS to dry off.

/\/\/\


There were no hearths in the TARDIS, so they built a roaring campfire in an empty room, found a decent vintage in the wine cellar, and toasted jelly babies.

Romana gazed thoughtfully at her pink sweet as it melted in the flames. "I take it that means we're in love now."

"Yes. We've done everything on the list."

"It's a lot of fuss for something so simple," she said. "I know it's not obvious for them, but can't they just tell one another?"

"Oh, they do." The Doctor tugged a melted orange mess from one of the prongs of his toasting fork and popped it into his mouth. "But, you know, they're not telepathic. They have to keep proving it."

"I see." Her jelly baby dropped off the fork and landed in the fire with a pop and a sizzle. Romana sighed. "So what do they do next?"

"Do you know, I've never had a satisfactory answer to that. It seems to be rather private."

"Oh." That was a shame, she thought. It would have been interesting to see this experiment to its proper conclusion.

"So I thought maybe we could cuddle and do some maths."

She beamed at him. "That would be delightful."

The Doctor grinned back. "Well, we are Time Lords."

Date: 2010-09-16 09:26 pm (UTC)
lurkingcat: (Default)
From: [personal profile] lurkingcat
(Here via [community profile] dwfiction)

This was lovely and made me giggle too. Giant slugs and experiments on bouquets of flowers and not-quite-toasted jelly babies and cuddles and maths feels so very right for a pair of Time Lords :)

Date: 2010-09-16 09:28 pm (UTC)
dbskyler: (Four smiling)
From: [personal profile] dbskyler
OMG! I love this fic! I want to take it and cuddle with it and smush it, but not kiss it because that would be icky.

How can I have just met you, and the first thing I read of yours is instantly one of my favorite fics ever? Where's your other fic? *Goes to find*

Date: 2010-09-16 09:29 pm (UTC)
sharpest_asp: Sarah Jane and Three together (Doctor Who: Three and Sarah Jane)
From: [personal profile] sharpest_asp
Hi there, meet my giant LOVE for this story. As in Recced it already, because it is just TOO perfect and adorable.

That is so them!

Date: 2010-09-16 11:30 pm (UTC)
sharpest_asp: Sarah Jane and Three together (Doctor Who: Three and Sarah Jane)
From: [personal profile] sharpest_asp
No problem! It was my pleasure.

Date: 2010-09-16 09:33 pm (UTC)
ilyena_sylph: picture of Labyrinth!faerie with 'careful, i bite' as text (Default)
From: [personal profile] ilyena_sylph
Awwwwwwwww... that's great!

(here via my GF, [personal profile] sharpest_asp, who demanded I read it right now!)

Date: 2010-09-16 09:52 pm (UTC)
dragovianknight: closeup of a green dragon (Default)
From: [personal profile] dragovianknight
*utterly charmed* ^__^

Date: 2010-09-16 11:09 pm (UTC)
katharos: (Default)
From: [personal profile] katharos
This is just beautiful! I don't know, something about the image of Romana doing experiments on the bunch of flowers was especially charming to me.

Date: 2010-09-16 11:29 pm (UTC)
erinptah: (Default)
From: [personal profile] erinptah
I started laughing at "I did," he said, and twiddled a knob sulkily. "She said I was doing it all wrong." and more or less did not stop for the rest of the fic.

The Doctor said it was the best reconstituted food he'd ever tasted, and accidentally set his scarf on fire with the candle.

Heeee.

She took cuttings, got them to grow under five types of sunlight, discovered three new uses for Terran chlorophyll while she was at it, and wrote a paper.

*flail*

She laid down next to him, closed her eyes, and they shared a wonderful dream about custard threatening UNIT.

Awww.

"So what do they do next?"

"Do you know, I've never had a satisfactory answer to that. It seems to be rather private."


Of course.

"So I thought maybe we could cuddle and do some maths."

Perfect ending. Absolutely perfect.

The folks over at [community profile] asexual_fandom would probably appreciate a crosspost - I know this is going in my own personal canon now :D

Date: 2010-09-16 11:56 pm (UTC)
jaythenerdkid: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jaythenerdkid
That was lovely! I have a big, silly grin on my face from reading it. :)

Date: 2010-09-17 05:34 am (UTC)
evilawyer: young black-tailed prairie dog at SF Zoo (Default)
From: [personal profile] evilawyer
I love it! So sweet!

(Here from dwfiction, if you like to keep track of that sort of thing.)

Date: 2010-09-17 08:49 am (UTC)
azurelunatic: A glittery black pin badge with a blue holographic star in the middle. (Default)
From: [personal profile] azurelunatic
I enjoyed this! All candlelight dinners need to end with fire!

Date: 2010-09-17 02:49 pm (UTC)
singe: The word Singe with a backdrop of flames. (Default)
From: [personal profile] singe
Oh, how fun! And hilarious. Thanks for this!

Date: 2010-09-17 04:16 pm (UTC)
jadelennox: Crazy Cat Doctor (Simpsons-style fourth Doctor, with cats) (doctor who: cat doctor)
From: [personal profile] jadelennox
oh, I adore this, especially when he gives her the bouquet and she writes a paper.

Date: 2010-09-17 04:25 pm (UTC)
execute: (Default)
From: [personal profile] execute
Oh, oh - this is so adorable. As an asexual, this is pretty much my dream romance. If this was made into an ace rom com I would be its biggest fan and metaphorically cuddle it and whatnot.
Yeah, I'm embarrassing, but I just SQUEED OUT LOUD HERE AT THE ADORABILITY.

Date: 2010-09-17 08:10 pm (UTC)
hokuton_punch: A screenshot of baby Italy from Hetalia. (hetalia baby italy cute roadie_icons)
From: [personal profile] hokuton_punch
Ahahhaha, so glorious and ADORABLE. ♥ I love it.

Date: 2010-09-17 08:42 pm (UTC)
redsnake05: Picture of a girl in flowers (General: Floral girl)
From: [personal profile] redsnake05
Here via [community profile] asexual_fandom. I loved how tone-perfect this fic was. All the little details were gorgeous.

Date: 2010-09-17 08:58 pm (UTC)
katarik: DC Comics: Major Slade Wilson and Captain Adeline Kane, text but I can make you better (sunshiney day.)
From: [personal profile] katarik
This is the cutest Who fic I think I have ever seen, and it makes me *beam*. I love the ways they're not human, and the ways they love each other.
Edited Date: 2010-09-17 08:59 pm (UTC)

*laugh*

Date: 2010-09-18 07:19 am (UTC)
ysabetwordsmith: Cartoon of me in Wordsmith persona (Default)
From: [personal profile] ysabetwordsmith
This is hilarious. Well done!

Date: 2010-12-07 06:37 am (UTC)
persiflage_1: I Prefer Reading (I Prefer Reading)
From: [personal profile] persiflage_1
Here via a rec from dbskyler.

This is too funny - it's just so very Four-and-Romana. I think the custard dream and the her experiments on the bouquet of flowers were the most amusing for me.

Date: 2010-12-07 03:37 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] curuchamion
Custard threatening UNIT, hurrah!

This is awesome and lovely. :D

Date: 2011-04-06 04:20 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] curuchamion
THAT WAS YOU?!

Okay, friending now. (Or whatever the heck they call it over here. Still getting used to this place - I am the stickiest stick-in-the-mud that ever sticked, in some ways.)

Date: 2011-04-06 04:35 pm (UTC)
curuchamion: First Doctor inside a Dalek, from The Space Museum (One in a Dalek)
From: [personal profile] curuchamion
I understand... I post a lot more stuff under lock (nobody I know IRL is on my flist, but my family do know my journal name), including the meta/debate/rant posts I just don't want getting trolled by random whatnots, so I'm conversely freer with granting access to people who are definitely not spambots. *g*

Date: 2013-04-19 01:32 am (UTC)
rbmifan: (Default)
From: [personal profile] rbmifan
This is absolutely perfect. I've only seen a couple of serials with Romana and the Doctor so far, but this is exactly the sort of thing they'd do <3

Date: 2013-04-19 03:31 pm (UTC)
rbmifan: (Default)
From: [personal profile] rbmifan
I came here from this post on The Whofic Lost and Found. Which isn't particularly recent, so it might not be where everyone else is coming from.

Date: 2015-01-02 07:23 am (UTC)
shyfoxling: glowing blue circles and hexagons on a dark blue background (doctor who (TARDIS scanner))
From: [personal profile] shyfoxling
Judging by the rest of the comments, I suppose I was right to assume that "ace" meant asexual in this context. This was rather silly, but I mean that in a good way. Rather fits the tone for Four and Romana. (Toasting jelly babies XD I hope that room has good ventilation... or I guess it's true that Gallifreyans don't have the same problems with suffocating gases as humans do, at least not as quickly.)

Date: 2015-12-03 01:40 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
This is just perfect!

I've never come across aro fluff before -- I hadn't even realized that it was a thing that could exist -- but I think it's my new favourite thing.

"Lips releasing endorphins under pressure", heh. That... actually would make more sense to me, if it was true.

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charamei

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