My Soul Hath Elbow Room!

Review: Doctor Who: Autonomy

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 15:49:46 GMT

As I commented to aleas_iacta a couple of days ago, my reading pile seems to be sitting on top of a minor spatio-temporal anomaly that continually spits out new Doctor Who. (It's better than Weevils, I suppose.) Why, just today I went into W H Smith's to get the Guardian and see if they had restocked Young Bond: By Royal Command (they haven't), and came out with the Space Museum/The Chase boxset and Wishing Well.

Only one of those was entirely planned, and I'm sure my accidental acquisition of Wishing Well has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that the Doctor Who books are shelved just above Young Bond in the children's section.

This tendency of mine to go into Smith's, gravitate to Young Bond, discover that the book I'm looking for is out of stock (Double or Die was missing when I was looking for that one, then it was Hurricane Gold, and now it's By Royal Command - I swear they're doing it on purpose) and turn to the shiny orange oval for comfort also explains how Autonomy got onto my pile.

( At least the rift managed to spawn a good one this time. )

If you're looking for an enjoyable Who fix, try Autonomy. It's fast, clever, exciting, and even the massive authorial oversight couldn't make it worse. Wishing Well is going to have to work hard to top this one.

/\/\/\

Death in Blackpool has (a) been out since December and (b) an hilarious canon conflict with End of Time? Aww, man! I need a better rift manipulator :(

(Not buying it. Noooooot buying it. Waiting until I've saved up enough to buy the whole series and get my discount. Waaaiiiiiitiiiing.)

My fandom is old and I should feel old?

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 19:53:23 GMT

To all in Superman TV fandom:

The 'Lois and Clark' tag is not for the pairing, it's for the TV series. Plz to stop putting Smallville and Superman Returns stuff under it, kthxbai.

P.S. I can't remember what happened in Smallville from week to week, yet I can remember Lois and Clark episodes that I last saw three or four years ago. WHY IS THAT, I WONDER?

PH34R MA POLITICKS

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 13:10:21 GMT

An election is coming. Universal peace is declared and the foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry. - T. S. Eliot

...hm. Not the most apt quote. More like 'outright war is declared and the foxes slaughter one another to get at just one mangy, non-laying chicken'.

But anyway.

The foxes in today's instance would be the Conservative Party, who know where I live and also possibly what I did last summer. Alas, they are clearly unaware that I am an armchair political scientist with a blog, a tendency to analyse random bits of paper put through my door by political parties, and a desperate need to distract myself today.

They sent me an 'Issues Survey'. It's pretty poor, both in how little it covers (it's one side of A4) and in the way the questions are laid out. So before I send it back, let's go through it! Because political science is fun and socially responsible!

( Winston Churchill defines a parliamentary candidate: 'He is asked to stand, he wants to sit, he is expected to lie.' )

Those were my thoughts on ~~yaoi~~ Issues of the Day as defined by the Conservative Party. Now to go and find something else to do so I don't end up stewing all day.

ETA: OH ONE MORE THING. I initially thought this survey was anonymous, but it's not - it's printed on the back of the form letter they wrote to get people to fill it in. The form letter with my name and address on. If I hadn't checked the Data Protection Act box already, I would now.

There's a couple of centuries in you yet, old girl...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 00:48:46 GMT

I keep wondering why I'm still writing First Steps. Every time I get inspired for it I seem to end up derailed by more important things (essay deadlines, family stuff, you name it), and the stubborn need to finish the damn thing has been preventing me from concentrating on anything else. Original novels aside, there's a Four/Romana oneshot - probably not more than 4-5k when finished - that's sitting on my hard drive and dying to be finished...

And yet, I can't stop writing it. It's not dead, it's just been in a couple of nasty accidents.

And today, it squeezed my hand and said my name and hauled itself off life support once more, bless its soul. aleas_iacta was cringing about the burns scene before I wrote it, too, the poor dear...

Next up: another gorram corridor scene, albeit a short one. Then, dead babies.

(Mental note: find a way to get the word 'pustules' in somewhere when rewriting.)

/\/\/\

For my own future reference, the way to turn the NumPad back on when Ubuntu's inaccessibility* feature decides to be stupid is System -> Preferences -> Keyboard -> Mouse Keys -> Uncheck the magically self-checking box called 'Pointer can be controlled using the keypad'. NO IT BLOODY WELL CAN NOT.

*Whyyyyyyyyy do I have to have accessibility mode turned on to use the language switcher? I'm not blind, deaf, arthritic, or any other form of disability, I just want to write in Greek occasionally!

ETA: It occurs to me how appropriate this icon actually is tonight. Tomorrow may very well indeed be hell.

Reviews: The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart, A Thousand Ships

Mon, 08 Mar 2010 17:24:15 GMT

As it happened, I finished two books last night: one was delightful, the other was finished through sheer force of will.

A Thousand Ships first. It's the first part of Eric Shanower's Age of Bronze, an historically accurate graphic-novel retelling of the entire Trojan War.

( And any loose talk about a beloved having a face that launched a thousand ships would have to be backed by evidence that the object of desire did indeed look like a bottle of champagne. )

Excellent stuff.

And then... there's that other book.

( We ain't unoriginal and we ain't unresearched, we's just a good idea been done wrong. )

I could go on. I won't. The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart has the potential to be a great book, but is let down by poor prose and lack of visible character development. A terrible waste of some brilliant ideas.

Random Fandom Things

Fri, 05 Mar 2010 22:31:46 GMT

Saw the new Doctor Who trailer on BBC One last night (well, half of it. The TV switched over and I had a panic getting it back to Channel 1). I am... still having trouble differentiating the Eleventh Doctor from the Tenth. I really hope Smith can make the part his own quickly in the first episode.

Also, FFS, BBC, we've known it was coming in Easter 2010 for two frigging years. This isn't news. Give us a proper date, kthxbai.

Also, Being Human! Series finale! Finally watched it! Not very impressed for the first time this series! Going to stop exclaiming now!

( Well maybe just one more! Spoilers under the cut! )

I suppose in some ways it was a great finale, except that the episode continued for half an hour afterwards.

Other things! I'm currently struggling through The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart, although I no longer know why - I got bored enough to turn to the end, and it doesn't get any better or worse as it goes on (in fact, the end looks like a terrific disappointment, but I'll save that judgement until I've read it properly at least). I suppose one of those is a blessing. Review up soonish, most likely. Then I plot to finish The Eyeless, which I've been halfway through reading forever, and then we'll see. Every time I look at my bookshelf, A Game of Thrones looks back, GRRM taunting me from between its multitudinous pages, but after getting bogged down in Perdido Street Station... ehhh.

LJ's faaailing, LJ's faaailing, fetch the engines, fetch the engines!

Fri, 05 Mar 2010 01:33:15 GMT

Dear Livejournal,

You and I have never been close, have we? We pass one another in the night, and I only seem to come round your house to water the plants and yell at you when you've trashed the car again.

On the other hand, if you trashed the car less regularly, maybe I'd visit more often.

Seriously, LJ. Stop trashing the car.

And especially stop redirecting my insurance money to pay for your damn car after you trashed it last time, when you ran over those transsexuals! Twice!

Too metaphorical, didn't read: LJ is redirecting links to e-commerce sites through a badly-written Javascript and a server of uncertain provenance. They are stripping out affiliate links and substituting their own - which is, needless to say, unethical, underhanded and illegal. It's occurring on all types of account, from free right up to permanent.

There is an obscure opt-out mechanism, but it will only work if you're logged in.

I make that a fail for every month of this year so far.

I therefore propose that we at DW hold a bake sale on our front lawns, to lure LJ's kids away from the car before it ends up in another drunken wreck. I'll bring the cookies?

This icon is/is not a lie

Thu, 04 Mar 2010 12:10:24 GMT

If the dreams are a gateway to the subconscious, then here's what I learned about mine last night:

It is a little behind the current curve of my fandom life.

It still really, really likes Harry Potter.

But not enough to not periodically morph me into Hermione so I could call Harry/myself an idiot.

It is confused between teenage magic users and thinks that Hogwarts secret passages may be found in Sabrina's airing cupboard (well, my airing cupboard, but I recognise the device when I see it).

It is still utterly convinced that Potter witches fly their brooms sidesaddle, despite years of trying to square the canon with my mental image.

It's got its own Potter OC, who never makes it into fic but turns up regularly in the relevant dreams.

It is still, without fail, capable of creating a coherent plotline with a maximum of one 'dream' element (in this case, the airing cupboard). Boy, if I'd known I was hardwiring my brain into storytelling this effectively, I'd probably have eased off a bit...

(Srsly. Astride on a broom? Doesn't work! Sidesaddle! SIDESADDLE I SAY!)

OMG STAN LEE!!1

Wed, 03 Mar 2010 00:44:19 GMT

You know you're a geek when you start laughing at the opening gag of a Big Bang Theory episode before it occurs, because you recognise the object that's about to catalyse it.

Really nice use of it, though - especially giving it to the character with selective mutism.

Also, STAN LEE!

And you've gotta love Sheldon's collector's logic. "Then I will have a unique, albeit confusing, artefact." <3

Still haven't watched the Being Human finale... and Glee is oddly addictive.

Meanwhile, Charles and Dora are actually developing backstory and sideplots OMG, and if Ellie would only tell me what it is that she's tying herself to railings over then that would be insanely helpful for worldbuilding. Ever since she was transplanted into a gender-equal world, my poor ex-suffragette has been a rebel without a cause.

D'oh!

Sat, 27 Feb 2010 01:19:20 GMT

I have just realised why I've been so hungry this week.

It's because now it's warm enough to stay outside for an hour or so without becoming hypothermic, I've been doing exactly that - on my swing. Which constitutes physical exertion, Charamei you moron, so no, you can't stick with your winter regimen of doing little and eating less. More calories out = more calories in.

Yeesh.

Still, at least it's paying off, if by 'paying off' you mean 'the muse has come out of hibernation and dumped three new story ideas on me in a week' or 'and now the writing bug seems to be waking up too, yay.'

(My calluses are resurfacing nicely after spending the winter under gloves. With luck, I won't even get that horrible blister that always pops up on my left hand. As for the other set of blisters, no sign of them, either.)

My Dissertation

Thu, 25 Feb 2010 16:20:55 GMT

Because somebody on the Internets asked for it, and because my diploma finally arrived, here's my MA dissertation.

The title: Tropologising Myth: interpreting the megatext of myth through the vernacular of modern shared narrative systems
Which means in English: How all classical myth and literature is basically fanfiction

(You see why we had to give it a poncy title.)

This is changed in only one significant way from the original: the addition of a Creative Commons license. Please note that this means my name and college are in the header, not the title, as that's where I put them for handing essays in to school.

Tropologising Myth: interpreting the megatext of myth through the vernacular of modern shared narrative systems by Catherine Russell is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at http://charamei.dreamwidth.org/34111.html.

Please comment in this post for license extensions etc, and link to my Dreamwidth account when attributing.

Download [PDF]

And just to warn anyone wanting to use this for serious academia: it's not very good. I scraped a pass, due partly to laziness and partly to my family life falling down around my ears last year when I was meant to be doing this. Please be careful to critique it thoroughly.

Pee jokes are still funny, right?

Wed, 24 Feb 2010 20:36:27 GMT

...did I really just see a Pampers advert that advertises 'golden sleep' for the baby?

*dies laughing*

Oh, come on.

Wed, 24 Feb 2010 15:47:32 GMT

So a leaflet from the Royal Mint just came through the door. They're doing commemorative Doctor Who coins, although commemorating what I'm not quite sure.

Even putting aside my generalised lack of interest in memorabilia, and the prohibitive prices, they've done a lazy job here. There's a not-very-good likeness of David Tennant, a Dalek, K-9 and maybe the TARDIS. And that's it.

Hartnell through Eccleston? Who're they? Nobody could possibly want to commemorate Tom Baker...

And - and this is where I pull out the 'Who Geek' icon - if the Mint was going to do Who coins, they could at least have mocked up a pandak or two. We know the shape and colour - hexagonal and silver - and there's a perfectly good Gallifreyan alphabet/glyph set that the BBC put together for the new series.

They're aiming for the hardcore fans anyway - nobody else will lay down upwards of £35 for a worthless coin with a Dalek on it. Why not go all the way and give us massive nerdgasms? I know I'd have at least seriously considered buying a pandak*, and see previous comments on lack of interest and the pricing.

Nutella did more work than this back when they were giving out Asterix sestertii free in every jar! Honestly. If you're going to milk the cash cow, do it right.

*This is because I mostly write Gallifrey-centric fic, of course: being able to do weight calculations on their currency would keep me happy for ages. You're carrying how much money in that briefcase, Drax? Okay, but your arms might fall off...

In Rasalon Wilds, rocks throw you!

Tue, 23 Feb 2010 16:19:43 GMT

For aleas_iacta, as a welcome-to-Dreamwidth gift.

Take them if you like, although I can't imagine what non-members of my RP group would want with some of these.

All bases are by Sibelle.

Possibly more to come, 'cause I'm bored.

ETA: How is it that I don't have a Tranan icon yet. This is a travesty.

Spring is in the air

Tue, 16 Feb 2010 19:27:32 GMT

Today has been the quintessential d-day: dark, dreary, depressing, driving rain. And compared to yesterday, which was sunny and vaguely warmish, it's really not been much to shout about.

But there's something in the air besides the magic flying water. I don't know if it's a smell, a sound, a feeling or even just the fact that it's pissing it down, but... it feels like spring at last.

Affirmative action

Tue, 16 Feb 2010 02:05:03 GMT

You.

Yeah, you, the three Time Tots hiding behind the sofa from the Thing. Come out and talk to me.

Seriously, kids. I've restarted Chapter Three four times because you can't decide who's got POV, how Tagalong escapes from his Loom, or at what precise time Snail comes back down the stairs. And just when I finally think we've got it all sorted out, you wander off and don't even bother to leave the plot behind, so I have to scramble to reconstruct it from scratch.

Flabbaduckarusa. HERBIVORES ARE IMPORTANT. Stop trying to erase the plot point, sweetie, mmkay?

Snail. Work out a way to get your necessary character development in, willya? You don't have to do it all by yourself, you know, your brother's right there.

Tagalong. I want a detailed, timestamped chart of your position relative to the Thing's, on my desk by tomorrow morning. No buts. No bloodstains. No bullying the others into doing it for you.

And you, Time Lord Dogsbody #1, come back here so the furious NPCs can exposit at you.

First Steps is over a year old now, guys. I have Chester waiting in the wings, not to mention Four and Romana hacking through the bath-house with a machete. If I have to write a sentence a day, so help me, I will finish this.

But it'll go a lot faster if y'all help.

Are we ready? Good! Let's go, then.

Who knew? Apparently there really is no problem in sci-fi that can't be solved by the addition of a smug talking computer.

(Okay, so strictly speaking it only solves Flabbaduckarusa/Braxiatel's section, but since he's the one who's been causing most of the problems, I'm happy.)

Review: Die Fledermaus (Opera Della Luna at the New Wimbledon Theatre)

Sat, 13 Feb 2010 01:14:44 GMT

If opera is the disapproving grandfather of the modern musical then operetta is its batty elderly aunt, the one who sits in the corner at parties alternating between being violently racist and telling the dirtiest jokes you've ever heard.

She also has the weirdest stories to tell, if you have the time to listen. There's the one about the pirates, the one about the fairies marrying the Lords... and the one about the revenge of the bat.

But she can only tell that one in German, so someone has to translate it. And when the translator is the family's chavvy teenage cousin, who's smashed off his head and rather free with the details, well, then you might come close to what I've just seen.

( What a gorgeous, ah-ha-ha, situation, ah-ha-ha... )

It was... bizarre, especially at first. But somehow, it worked. The actors were all excellent; the translation was mostly very good, save for a couple of rhyming/scansion problems, and of course the music was wonderful and the plot, being a farce, can happen anywhere, at any time. Perhaps most importantly, it was still funny.

Because really, that's the most important thing about Auntie Operetta, isn't it?

/\/\/\

"The spirit of your husband is here... in this room. He's standing right next to you..."
"No I'm not! I'm over here!"

I always forget how good the original Randall and Hopkirk (deceased) is. Then it comes back on ITV4...

Attention: World

Wed, 10 Feb 2010 21:07:08 GMT

It has recently come to my attention that the single most confusing three-dimensional shape in the multiverse is a pair of trousers.

I'm going to end up writing fic about this, I just know it.

(I defeated them, though! I am now the proud creator of two pairs of snuggly, warm and not-even-the-tiniest-bit-in-holes pyjamas.)

Being Human S02E04

Sun, 31 Jan 2010 23:32:42 GMT

Thank GOD, nobody exploded, imploded, asploded or even fursploded.

Except in the gorram recap, THANK YOU BBC FOR THAT I HAD JUST BARELY FORGOTTEN IT.

Marvellous lack of plode aside, this episode was wonderful. I have never laughed so much at BH. Long may it continue.

I'm sure I've seen Sykes' actor somewhere before (actually, I spent half the episode convinced he was Matt Smith), but apparently not, to judge by his complete lack of existence on IMDb or the BBC's own website.

I do love the idea of Annie being saved by a Jack Harkness lookalike. Meanwhile, George is hilarious and Mitchell sucks, in all ways but the expected vampiric one.

Review: Hurricane Gold (Young Bond #4)

Sat, 30 Jan 2010 00:34:33 GMT

I love Charlie Higson.

This is because the man terrifies the shit out of me. I mean, Steven Moffat does things that I understand are scary in theory but don't feel in practice (the exception being The Empty Child), Kelley Armstrong occasionally freaks me out and the last chapter of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde is forever etched in my memory, but for pure untainted disgusting, gory horror, the kind that gets into my bones and has me utterly gripped even as I squirm, and then cracks a joke and makes me laugh, it's Higson every time. In the first three books of this series, he's had his erstwhile protagonist:

Immersed in a tank of hungry eels

Nearly turned into an eel-human mutant... thing

Tied to a stake in the middle of a jungle and eaten alive by mosquitoes

Waterboarded with high-proof liquor, resulting in alcohol poisoning

To say nothing of the various disturbing deaths of side characters and the fucking running joke in Double or Die where one of the mooks keeps losing body parts in unlikely Bond-related circumstances, counting down to his final death.

And these are just his YA novels. Were I to add in Randall and Hopkirk (deceased), I could also mention beheading, incurable measles, umbrella-through-the-chest, David Tennant in a bloodstained wedding dress wielding a chainsaw... oh, and a ghost clearing a room by farting.

( The Mayans used to talk of a cursed treasure called hurricane gold, which if you held on to it would bring ruin to you and your family... )

General Election Fault

Thu, 28 Jan 2010 14:43:17 GMT

Ubuntu 9.10 boot disk: free
Time spent arguing with OS, mistakenly assuming it was a software fault: Three weeks
New physical drive: £50

A functional work space that no longer crashes every two minutes, uncluttered and running my OS of choice? Priceless.

/\/\/\

Got the first election pamphlet through the door today, from the Conservatives. It's not exactly inspiring: the most interesting thing about it is that our MP is retiring and the new candidate is the younger brother of a fairly major political figure.

Which, uh. Damnit. That means the party thinks my constituency is a reasonably safe seat, and since I don't intend to vote Tory, I might as well not bother.

First past the post: worst. Electoral system. Ever.

Damn characters.

Tue, 26 Jan 2010 16:48:33 GMT

Dear Chester:

I know you're excited about all the wondrous things you've suddenly started noticing about your world, and you're eager to tell me all about them, not to mention the legal system, the government and that elusive religion. I think it's great that you're finally mature enough to be able to tell me whether your world uses steam or not, whether you have electricity or not, and where you live (although, seriously, the rent on that mousehole's a bit high, isn't it?). I'm even more pleased that you've got your opening scene all plotted out, and that you've even managed to slide a couple of Chekhov's Guns in there, nice and early.

But, Chester, when I sat down yesterday and said, "Right, worldbuilding time!" ...Sweetie, I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to the Fifth Doctor, and Nyssa, and Nerys and Police Guy and Dead Witness #2. This is because, Chester, the deadline for that contest is next Monday, and at this moment in time I need their worldbuild much, much more than I need yours. Hell, two of them don't even have names yet, the third is randomly Welsh, and most importantly, I can't refine their plot until I know how their planet works.

I will get back to you, I promise. I love your story and I love your world, even more so with all the new stuff you keep telling me about. But please, for the next few days, stop bugging me. Take a leaf out of Tranan's book: nobody's seen him since the competition started, not even Unam or Talla. Go and travel your world, see the sights, and bring me back photos, because I will be fascinated.

Just not right now.

Love,
Your friendly neighbourhood author.

Being Human

Sun, 24 Jan 2010 22:11:46 GMT

It's much, much easier to avoid cracking Randall and Hopkirk (deceased) jokes when the characters do it for you. Thanks, George.

Also, what's happened to everyone's morals this series? It's not so much a drift as a sudden absence.

I thought Snopes had discredited this one

Wed, 20 Jan 2010 23:24:19 GMT

So apparently, the 830th most popular girl's name in the US in 1921 was Concepcion (page 39).

Oh, character naming days, you never cease to amuse me.

(This tag is incorrect. The novel's working title is now The Memories of Chester Snitterfield.)

ETA: And the 599th most common male name was Gaylord. Oh deary deary me...

Tue, 19 Jan 2010 01:42:31 GMT

OH NOES THE DOCTOR HAD A HEART ATTACK ON HUSTLE!

It's just as well. I probably couldn't have made it to the end of the episode with a straight face otherwise: Colin Baker's voice is too recognisable.

And it was a good episode. I'm glad it seems to be getting back on its feet, after all its casting problems (among others...). I want to catch up on all the bits I've missed now.